That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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