so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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