Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
The feeling are messing with the penis
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
