You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Randomize
