I'm so fucking centered right now
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
