i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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