how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Randomize
