That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
operation harelip BJ is a go
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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