just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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