dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
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yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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