Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize