you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
