My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Randomize
