Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
