scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
