I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
