Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?