You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
