Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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