we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
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I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
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So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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