she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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