I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
