it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
