Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
