I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
He kissed a someone with a penis
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
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