OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
He felt like a one man threesome
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Randomize
