what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
