hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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