In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
