Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
