I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
