Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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