Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
