We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Randomize
