Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
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