i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize