think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
that may or may not have been my penis.
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