But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize