dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
