I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize