so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Quick, to the slutcave!
I am full of burrito and curiosity
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
