Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize