he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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