I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Randomize
