Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Randomize