dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
