I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize