you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
