Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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