Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
