So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
