just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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