I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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